The Ukulele Project 8.5/10 – Cowgate Udderbelly Belly Bancer

Size isn’t everything. Disregarded previously as a musical punchline (not helped by the comical strummings of George Formby), the ukulele has enjoying a recent resurgence thanks to folk rock bands like Mumford & Sons. The Ukulele Project, a trio of teenagers, apply their wee guitars to an eclectic range of hits from Dolly Parton to the Beatles. Lead male vocalist Oli Peacock is pleasingly reminiscent of Damien Rice and his acoustic covers of Radiohead’s Karma Police and Arcade Fire’s Rebellion were arguably better than the originals. The only criticism being the inclusion of a Bond medley was uncharacteristically childish but only because the maturity of performance makes you forget the age of the performers.

Naked Splendour 9/10 – C-Venues Carlton Hotel

“Contains nudity, drawing involved” warns the ticket. Audience members are handed sketch pads and pencils upon entering the worryingly intimate auditorium (drawing involved – check). Philip Herbert has dedicated his life to life modelling and through innovative participatory theatre, recounts witty and absurdist anecdotes. After the subject strips (nudity – check), an initially embarrassed audience soon settles to intense concentration as sketchers attempt to capture Herbert’s naked splendour. The show certainly answered my questions about life modelling (what happens if you fall asleep or get an erection?) and I’m now considering giving life classes a go – drawing not modelling mind.

Apparently the rendering of the model's genitals says a lot about your personality - do you go for the darkened area, acorn or exaggeration?

Is that your hand on my butt...?

Jackass defined a genre and a generation. A gaggle of bored twenty-somethings performing feats of daring idiocy and playing pranks to amuse themselves and a dedicated fanbase. I’ll unashamedly admit I loved the original movie in 2002 but was less affected when Number Two arrived riding a runaway bull in 2006. Although I was impressed that Knoxville still participated in the more dangerous stunts despite Hollywood success (?) in Men in Black 2, the Dukes of Hazzard and the Ringer.

So now the Jackass boys are back to complete the hatrick adding that now ubiquitous extra dimension. The trailer appears pretty uninspired. I fear that post-naughties the world may have moved on from a grown man inserting a toy car into his rectum.

adj

1. of, having the nature of, situated in, or affecting the viscera
2. intuitive, instinctive, emotional, etc. rather than intellectual:

That Moment 8.5 / 10 – £10 Cowgate Underbelly

Energetic, imaginative one-woman show (so 90s) recounting the questionable life choices of an aspiring actress, complete with Lorraine-Kelly-accented agent spouting motivational cliches, homosexual theatrical directors and an incontinent dog. The tiny cave venue feels almost too intimate to contain the show’s energy and character range – at the climax the solo performer plays 7 different characters interchangeably. Witty and well-acted throughout.

Chef! 8 / 10 – £13 Assembly @ George St

Thankfully nothing you’d see at the Taste Festival. The food merely acts as backdrop to an innovative hour of beatbox, breakdancing, martial arts, a-capella and surreal Asian culinary comedy. Arguably the best set-piece involved the majority of the cast invisible in black body stockings manipulating items and two characters in a slow-motion, Streetfighter inspired dinner battle. Amazing beatboxing and breakdancing.

verb

1. To move a small child up and down on the knees or in the arms in a playful way.

2. To pamper or pet.

I'm glad I didn't have a hot, immoral, incorrigible sister growing up....

Southern Gothic is a subgenre of the gothic novel, exploring the social issues and cultural character of the American deep south. Notable protagonists including William Faulkner, Truman Capote and Cormac McCarthy. A ubiquitous feature of Southern Gothic is “the grotesque”, typically situations, places, or characters made cringe-worthy via racial bigotry or hypocritical, egotistical self-righteousness. The grotesque theme underpinning the movie Beautiful Kate… incest.

Although an Australian film, the arid scenery, isolation, restless natives and hardened simple farmfolk of the Flinders Range outback are analogous to the southern states of the US. Ben Mendelsohn is haunted, remorseful writer, Ned Kendall, returning to his remote family home to reconcile with and bid farewell to his dying father Bruce (Bryan Brown). Familiar household objects trigger teenage memories of Ned’s beautiful twin sister, Kate, (played by the stunningly ethereal Sophie Lowe) who seduced him without remorse.

The film is very reminiscent of The Reader. Middle-aged male lead haunted by flashbacks of a forbidden love. Mendelsohn’s powerful evocation of a man tormented and defined by his past anchors the film and offsets the discomfort of the incest scenes which director, Rachel Ward, boldly didn’t compromise. Incest is far more prolific than society likes to entertain – I read an article only last week on sibling marriages. Once you’ve wrapped your head around the central theme you’ll discover a beautifully shot, tightly scripted and emotively acted movie.

adj

Resembling butter in appearance, consistency, or chemical properties.

Cut a deal with the novelty beer sellers to promote their offering and they'll offer a 50% discount on subsequent purchases. 4 pints for $5 is a bargain, Miller Lite or not.

Bad Decisions Tour 2010 – a fortnight based out of Austin, visiting Lake Texoma for the Independence day long weekend before commencing an epic roadtrip to Vegas via Roswell, Santa Fe, Flagstaff and the Grand Canyon. Rather than a dull day-to-day diary of meals eaten and $s spent, I thought my inebriated, “fear & loathing” inspired scribblings might prove more amusive. Also check out my photos on Flickr, particularly Stevo’s MJ tribute.

Car rental: Hertz hooked us up. Apparently the standard-issue ‘economy’ model is not generic American beige such as a Toyota Camry or Ford Taurus but a SMART car. The perfect vehicle for a 20+ hour roadtrip surrounded by muscle cars, monster trucks and 18-wheelers. Thankfully depreciation (?) saved our blushes and our bacon. Drive a car one-way and receive a free upgrade. Our quadruple upgrade … a Dodge Charger. Thanks depreciation.

Roswell: Imagined this wee town to be like an extraterrestrial safari park. Big-eyed, grey, genitalia-free anal-probers removing wing mirrors and humping on the bonnet. The reality is a Main Street littered with souvenir shops and a lacklustre UFO museum. The spaceship-themed McDonalds playcentre was a nice contextual touch though.

Santa Fe: Feels like an Epcot Centre representation of Mexico. Mexicoland per se. But if you appreciate faux adobe, turquoise, art galleries and amazing clouds, Santa Fe is definitely worth a visit.

Vegas tips: Buy a 24-hour buffet ticket for $35. Buy $10 4-pint, giant novelty beers. Utilise available gambling coupons – we turned a $40 free bet into a $50 kitty. Don’t “hit” when the croupier is an elderly Asian woman. Don’t underestimate the dehydrating power of the Vegas sun. Don’t be intrigued by “Girls Direct” approaches on the Strip – nothing good can come of that.

Memorable quotes

Stevo on the Blue Man Group: “I’d be pissed too if a blue guy touched me”

L’il Wayne: “trading V-cards with retards”

Stevo on 67oz beer versus margaritas: “$1 margaritas will always be there, black guys with giant beers won’t”